1. Britt and Tiff, you are fabulous stars, and we love you. Tell me, what's the secret of your success?

Britt's like: Staying up late, younger boys, smoking cigs cause it looks really cool, drinking 40's, a lot of Britney Spears-inspired dancing,knowing that "we're the cutest girls here" wherever we go. I think counting buttons daily in front of the televison is a must.

and then Tiff goes: yeah and not getting caught by killers in san jose. fanclub every thursday, trying to get to second base and always just missing. freestyle walking. i'm all about text messaging-the new talking on the cell phone.

2. When did you start posting to missed connections? Is there an archive somewhere I can read about all of your fabulous adventures?

Britt's all: Unfortuantely, there is not yet an archive, but good one. We started posting last Halloween cause we were unsatisfied with the boys we knew. Our first posting was really the best(see attached posting), I think Tiff will agree, but we got a lot of weirdos that were thinking we were in high school and stuff. That we were gonna like suck dicks, when everyone knows that Britt and Tiff only go to second base. We met a couple of the boys. All boring. HEAR THIS MISSED CONNECTION DATES: YOU ARE BOOOORRIIINNGG!!!

Tiff goes: Yeah before missed connections we were all about women seeking men. But that's NOT where it's at. I tried to get a date for my birthday once. (see craigslist posting dated april 25th...but it's in women seeking men...)Bad idea because then i realized that, well, I was the lame one. That and I still didn't have a date.

3. Why missed connections? Are you posting anywhere else?

So Britt's like: We're starting to get a little too big for our britches with craig and his list. It's time to hit the streets. We're gonna start a street team and just have someone drive us around in a van and we'll jump out, dance, and get back in and go somewhere else. Soon to be featured in your hometown.

4. Prada. Good or bad? Britt rolls her eyes:Mmmmm...Good. Overated, but good. Tiff goes: Okay on J...who else owns real Prada?

5. College boys: love 'em or leave 'em?

Britt:We go to little league games. Tiff: That's elementary...

6. How do you and Tiff know each other?

Britt says: We were working at Buffalo Excahnge, dancing to teen pop and going to second base with skater boys. They LOVE us. They admit they love us. We're fuckin fun. We bought all their clothes. We did routines on the counters.

Tiff: I was britt's boss at The Buff. One time i let her call in sick due to too much drinking. Jack daniels, if i remember correcly, right Britt

Britt: Oh yeah.

Tiff: And not enough boy...

7. Have you read Glamorama? If so, the sex scene in the shower, hot or not? Britt squeals: Brett Easton Ellis is ace! Glamorama is not my favorite book of his, but the shower scene is way hot. I've got the page dog-eared.

Tiff: Good question, Mat. it's my favorite. No really, like before you asked and everything...you can ask Britt. Can't get through more than two paragraphs.

8. What do you hope to accomplish with your posts on CraigsList?

Britt's all:Um, maybe your mom will give us your phone number.

Tiff: Well, really i just want to meet boys. I'm the single one, remember? And i can babysit you.

9. Capri pants on men. Good or bad?

Britt goes:I find this question distasteful.

Tiff's all: Um, motion to have this question stricken. That posting was not from us. There's someone, or maybe lots of people, out there pretending to be us. the real brittandtiff are @hotmail.com. Be on the lookout! You'll know who they are because thier postings usually...well...suck.

Britt's like: It's flattering and all, but we're the farthest thing from Marina girls that like waiters that look like Tiger Woods. The thought of it makes me sick!!

Editor's Note: there are indeed quite a few people out there who claim to be Britt and Tiff.

10. How old are you?

Britt's all: Too old for Miller and James, apparantly.

Tiff's like: There's always Nick.

11. What have I not asked you that you want to tell me about?

Britt goes: My mom thinks I'm pretty. We love to watch the news. Call us, we'll come over. Back to you, Tiff.

Tiff: Well, you haven't asked where you should meet us for drinks. It's okay, i'll drive if your mom won't drop you off.

ewwwww get me away from here I'm dying